Entering their World
When we were kids, our mom often entered our world to play make-believe. And now as adults and a loved one has dementia, the best thing we can do is enter their world. It's not worth fighting it and telling them their reality isn't true. Because it very true for...
The Water Obsession
When I was in one of my medical classes we were taught that those with Alzheimer's Dementia were always attracted to water. So much so that it was dangerous if there was water around. If a patient went wandering, it would almost always be toward a...
Of Baby Dolls and Doggies
Sorry I can't find the youtube video that exactly corresponds to this link, but this is touching. It's also something we're experiencing with mom a little bit too....
Update: Sept 11, 2019
Eighteen years ago today I was sitting with my grandmother who had dementia/Alzheimers watching the tv as the towers fell. She didn't understand and wanted to go outside to see the chickens. I wanted to stay and watch the events unfold. Dementia won and we went to...
Joining their World
I've wondered sometimes if it is right to enter an imaginary world in order to bring comfort. As someone once said it is better to move into their world because they more than likely only intermittently come back to your world. And then the thought came to me...
Love for the Generations
Tender Moments in Terrified Times
My mom's fear of abandonment is crippling. She fears going into a nursing home and being separated from her family. We are doing everything to work towards that not happening. She also only sleeps until 3 am. Two nights ago out of a dead sleep I heard a mournful...
A Different Kind of Mother’s Day
Today is Mother's Day. And if I'm honest the last 5-6 years of caregiving have felt like mother's day. Perhaps how she felt as a mother to me and my brother. But today is different. We're not sitting in church, getting flowers, doing very much special things. We...
Sasquatch. Seriously.
My mom has enough fears already in her older years. And then a neighbor tells my mother there are sasquatches in the area. And formed a team to catch them. Ugh!! Don't say this kind of thing to older people!!! Or anyone for that matter.
To Avoid Self-Pity – Think on This One
Surgery #6
Mom had an unexpected surgery this past weekend. Just a couple of days in the hospital and then out. But it's been rough since then. General anesthesia is so hard on the older person's brain. On the other hand there was a sense that we've been there before on...
They call it “Showtime”
It's the mystery for caregivers across the world. Your loved one is confused, sees things, is up all night, is stuck on knowing which home they are in even when they are home, and then a visitor comes. When a friend or relative comes, it's like they don't have any...
Mom is Changing – Fast
Things are changing. Fast. Things are coming back strong. Nights are sleepless. Days are tiring. Love grows deeper. This is a marathon.
Jesus’ brothers and John and His Mother
When Jesus' mother was at the foot of the cross, his brothers and sisters were nowhere around. It's why on the cross he gave John the responsibility of caring for his mother, and his mother a son. Just because someone has siblings does not mean they are helping to...
Praying for Simon
There was a point that Jesus could not even go on physically. He had been beaten severely and was tasked with carrying his cross up a hill to his execution. But he could not do it. So in his utter weakness a soldier found a random stranger in the crowd and ordered...
Globus and Caregiver Health
Lately I've been having weird symptoms in the back of my throat. It feels like I have a golf ball back there. No irritation. No redness. Just a lump. I hear it's called a "globus" and it's a reaction to stress. In a few months we will be hitting our 5 year mark...
The Sleepless Nights Return
It's true. I only write when things are difficult. And it seems like difficult times are returning. For the last couple of years we went from the most difficult and wildest year in 2016 to moving to naturopathic medicine which put everything to a screeching halt....
New Discovery (When We Thought She was Going Downhill Again)
The life of the caregiver is one where you are kind of always on edge. When things change in a bad way, you think to yourself...this is it...things are going downhill. It's the constant bracing of yourself. And that's what I've thought recently with mom. She has...
