When my mom’s neurotic behavior hits, it’s hard to deal with. If we’re in the car she’s opening everything, trying to open the door, ripping out the a/c vents, fiddling with everything… It’s a challenge.
And today when I’m trying to feed her as that’s the stage we’re in, she is constant motion, rocking back and forth, fiddling with this and more. It was challenging to get the food into her mouth. And then get it to stay.
I pleaded with her to stop rocking long enough that I could get a spoon of food in her. Of course she didn’t like that I asked and was angry. I spoke as calmly as I could and tried to get her food in. It took awhile but we got it done.
A few hours later she was fearful, tearful and upset. When I asked why she said she was scared we were going to put her in a home. She is equating the slightest bit of frustration in a situation as something terrible and fearful. She is deathly afraid of abandonment and going into a home.
So tone matters. It’s hard not to have a slight edge in your voice. Especially when confronted with neurotic behavior. But I did give her some over-the-counter relaxer right after her meal and it did help quite a bit (Relax-All or Tranquinol is what we use).